Getting What You Want From Mentoring

Mentoring can be used to strengthen talents, hone skills and progress career plans. It can provide relevant, personalised and interactive professional development. And, managed well, mentoring is a mutually rewarding experience.

Both mentors and people who are mentored need guidance in getting the most from the relationship. Here are five top tips for mentorees on getting what you want:

1. Understand What Mentoring Is

A mentor does not tell you what to do, nor do they open doors for you. A mentor listens, asks questions and facilitates your goal setting and planning, decision making or problem solving process.

2. Find A Mentor

Mentoree's need to seek out potential mentors. You may need to network and connect with people outside your immediate area. While it's easy to develop rapport with people like yourself, there is more value from being mentored by someone different. If you are too alike you'll have the same strengths and the same challenges.

3. Develop Rapport

When you engage a person in conversation and ask questions you may fall into natural rapport. If you do it's easy to build a relationship. You can also use non-verbal skills such as matching and mirroring to develop rapport. Once there is rapport, if you want more than a one-off conversation you'll need to make mentoring a win-win proposition.

4. Make Mentoring Mutually Rewarding

Mentors are generally altruistic about giving the gift of their time but they're human, likely to be busy and have demanding schedules. You need make conversations with you enjoyable and satisfying for the mentor as well as beneficial to you. The keys to this are: business etiquette, positive feedback and appreciation. Good manners and politeness smooth the way. Let them know that you value and are using the information and insight that you gain.

5. You Drive The Relationship
Mentorees should request and confirm meetings, set the agenda and identify goals. It is your responsibility to make decisions and take actions to achieve them. A mentor is a resource, a facilitator. Its up to you to be ready, open and keep up the connection if you are to get what you want from mentoring. Finally, consider karma - you attract what you project, you get what you give.